Exercising Parental Authority

Good citizenship begins at home. Parents and guardians bear the primary responsibility for the actions of their children. They must set good examples for their children at home and in their community, teach morals and values, provide a safe home environment, make sure that their children get a good education, direct their children into constructive activities, be involved in their children's activities, make their children responsible and accountable for their actions, etc.

Dealing with Specific Problems - How to recognize the signs that your child may be involved in gangs, drug and alcohol abuse, and other problems.

Multiple Problems - Resources for helping children with multiple problems.

Parental Liability and Restitution - How parents or guardians are legally liable for the acts of their children.

Many good ideas for parenting and activities for children are contained in the San Diego Family and San Diego Parent magazines, which are published monthly and available free at many libraries, grocery and toy stores, schools, and other family-oriented establishments. They also contain calendars of family and children's events in San Diego County, many of which are free.

Another resource for parents is the San Diego Community College's continuing education program. It offers a variety of free classes at Centers throughout the City on child development, family relations, and many other topics. Call the North City Center of the San Diego Community College at (858) 627-2545 for class schedules and other information. For information on other classes in the city call the San Diego County Health and Human Services Agency Children's Services at (619) 338-2123.

Parents can get answers to many legal questions concerning their children from a booklet published by The State Bar of California entitled Kids and the Law: An A-Z Guide for Parents. This booklet deals with a range of subjects from the "Age of Majority" to "Zero Tolerance" with references to the relevant code sections. It also contains a glossary of legal terms. It is not, however, intended to substitute for the advice of an attorney. Also, it may not provide the latest code references. The text is available from The State Bar.

When a child becomes 18, he or she acquires a new set of legal rights and responsibilities. These deal with jury duty, voting, housing, contracts, torts, etc. They are discussed in question and answer form in a booklet entitled When You Become 18: A Survival Guide for Teenagers, which is available from The State Bar. Parents can use this booklet to help their children make the transition to young adults.

• Talk to your children. If they don't seem to be listening, keep talking. And tell them you love them.
• Listen to your children. This is more important than talking. Children know you care when you listen. Ask questions and listen.
• Have clear family rules. The consequences of breaking them should be clear.
• Be a good role model. Actions speak louder than words. Be the person you want your children to be.
• Discuss the consequences of tobacco, alcohol, and drug use. Tobacco is addictive. It yellows teeth, fouls breath, and kills. Drugs alter judgment and perspective, and interfere with physical, emotional, and social growth. They are also addictive.
• Know what your children are doing. Know what they do in school and after school. Know their friends. Be involved in their lives.
• Educate yourself on the social and emotional needs of your children.